When God keeps shaking your nest and you're finally ready to fly off the edge.
My feet curl when the ground beneath me is new. I’m always pacing around the edge of the unfamiliar.
You’d see me walking around shutting doors and windows as though a storm was coming. Maybe a storm is happening in my own heart. Thrusting me back and forth between the old and the new.
The rooms are still unfamiliar. The faces. The air. The language. The routine. Everything here unearths my comfort. I’ve never walked this season before. I’ve never been where I am today before. So what makes me think I’d know what to do: where to put my fidgety hands and curling toes? And yet…this is right where God wants us. Where we couldn’t stand or walk without Him.
But your heart cannot help a breaking, when God keeps asking you to pack bags, pack relationships, pack your life into boxes. and. go. into the uncertain.
When it seems like just as you begin to lay your head down and rest in a place, in a season, God shakes that nest and, “It’s time to get going again.”
In 7 years, I have packed my bags 5 times into places and seasons that have turned my life completely right side up. And you’d think by now this journeying would be okay. This packing of dreams, and plans, would be okay. But it’s not.
“I miss home”, I whisper as my eyes wander in the dark. “But, this is home now”, says Mr. Steady.
And this is the thing: sooner or later you’ve got to decide whose agenda you will lay aside: yours or Christ’s? You’ve got to make up your mind, if your life is your own, or God’s. You’ve got to be convinced of where your heart is: with the gifts or with the Giver?
And hear this: as you make this cross-carrying decision, you’ve got to know this: you will not stay the same. You will say painful goodbyes, you will be called to discomfort, you will be called to inconvenient moments. You will be called to love the unlovable. Go where no one else will go. Reach out your fidgety hands as your curling toes learn to walk on holy ground.
Yes: you will be called to holy ground. To burning bushes: to throw what you have in the fire, even if it’s only your heart; so that He can lit it with what burns His Heart. You cannot stay the same. Comfort is no longer an option.
My feet curl.
Because really if we all chased comfort, who would do the hard work for God? Who would be His witness in the small and the big? Who would wash feet and be faithful in the mundane. Who would get their hands dirty and really get down to plant hearts. And this one might just upend romance as we know it: if we all chased comfort. Who would even love?
I watch the trees sway with the wind. And somehow I can finally see the dance. This is how we are called to sway with God. Move with Him. Dance with Him. Trust in Him.
That just as Christ shattered comfort zones, so are we called to: to pack bags and broken hearts and still say yes. To say as He says: “whoever does the will of God are my brothers and sisters...” (Matthew 12:50). This is the call: to go where the will of God leads.
And the new faces, and the new grounds is where we are called to pour the heart of God.
Because really if we are His witness, how do we ever expect to stay comfortable. There’s a world out there to save. There’s a world out there screaming: “where is this God?” So how can we stay in the familiar, when in fact, we are the answer.
And God knows. So He shakes our nest. Because otherwise: who would fly?